Anna doesn’t want me to die.

My daughter is obsessing about the fact that {most likely} I will die before her. She cries about this, saying she just can’t bear to think about how sad she’ll be when I die.

I don’t really know how to handle this.

I’ve told her I feel the same way about my mom, but there’s no point in being sad for something that hasn’t happened yet and we should just enjoy the time that we have.

But on the other hand, this girl holds in her feelings a lot, and I don’t think it’s a bad thing for her to have permission to cry about anything. I said, “Go ahead and cry it out instead of holding it in. But then when you’re done crying, think of all of your favorite things to do with me.”

I also told her what my friend Marcella told me: “Losing my mother was the hardest thing, and there’s no way to prepare for that level of sadness. So don’t think about it. There’s no point being sad about it before it happens, because there will be plenty of sadness after the fact.” That’s kind of a lot for a six-year-old to process, but it’s honest. I’ve held on to Marcella’s words whenever I start getting sad thinking about losing my own mom. I know it’s going to happen, but I have permission to not dwell on it until it does. Anna and my mom have a really special bond, and I’m almost more worried about her reaction to losing my mom than mine… almost.

I’m not sure how to help Anna get past this, so I’ll just keep letting her cry, and reassuring her that I {hopefully!} am not going anywhere soon.




Filed under Family

2 responses to “Anna doesn’t want me to die.

  1. Jeana

    U r such a good momma!!! I have met ur momma and I know where u got it from!!!

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